hyphenatedsuperhero

Hello, everyone!
It's been almost a year since I last posted a Journal entry and... while I think very few actually do read the journal, I think now it's as good a time as any to post an update.
Firstly, I'm officially out of school. And not in a good way. Mostly because of time mismanagement, I got myself kicked out of the Biology courses of the University of Guanajuato. But since I have an uncanny luck for second chances, my journey to become an actual paleontologist hasn't quite ended. I am going to start the Biology undergraduate courses in San Luis Potosí, the compatible subjects between both courses will be validated again, and I'll be living with my siblings from now on. Which is good too, because the moment I got expelled from Guanajuato, I fell into a deep, deep depression. Fortunately, I was offered (and took) professional help, and it coupled with medication and the company provided by my family is helping me far more than I expected.
On the subject of health, it turns out that my eyesight is worse than I thought but not as bad as it could be, so I'll be wearing glasses from now on. The good news are that according to the optometrist, my condition doesn't seem to be worsening so, as Spidey would say, thanks for the small favors.
Also, I became an actual paleoartist. Or what my narrow view defines as an "actual" paleoartist, anyway. My brother comissioned some restorations for his undergraduate thesis, on the remains of a marine crocodile, and now my art is actually published in scientific material. So yay me. I'm participating in a paleontology congress with my paleoart, too, so that is super exciting and a step forward, too.
All in all, the future doesn't look bleak, even if it isn't at all what I wanted a few months ago. But hey, that's life. It never goes the way you expect it to.

Hi there!
Welp. I have some updates.
Firstly, I have a job now. I'm officially a rock peddler. Which is kind of cool, because I get to work around fossils and precious and semi-precious stones. And I get to read about them and count it as work-related research. Also, sometimes I get to see cool people around the store. So far, I've met two actual paleontologists. And, as a nice side-effect, I've been losing some of my almost legendary shyness and I lost the fear of speaking in English, so... yeah, that's kind of cool, too.
The downside of it is that I don't have much spare time now, because of the work hours, but I get paid and that means I'll get to play Skyrim sometime in the future. Oh, yeah, my video card died, so I can't really play the games I used to.
Also, I saved my first paychecks to buy a Wacom tablet, so... yay me, that's a new tool I get to use. Maybe I'll even try my hand at digital coloring.
Aaaaand... that's it, I guess. There's really a lot going on, but I can't remember any of it right now. So... maybe I'l update this somewhere in the future. For the moment, I'm off to play with my new toy. See you around!

Wow. It's been a while since I did a tag. Also, tag is in Spanish, so... um... if you don't speak it, uh... sorry?

Stolen from
No, wait, you know what? I'm gonna break the rules and translate it. Because I'm evil. EEEEEVIIIIL...

Pick 10 of your OC characters (if you don't have that many OC's, you can "borrow" some from a volunteer for this tag). Then answer the quiz about the characters.

When you're done, tag five other people to do the same with their characters.

1.    Mictlantecihuatl
2.    Redback
3.   Coyolxauhqui
4.    Itaii
5.   Suzumebachi
6.   Pucu
7.   Chalchiuhtlicue
8.   Agent Michael Davids (the guy in the business suit)
9.    Xilonen
10.   Umang

1.- What was your first thought about character number 5?
Well, a friend told me that if I was going to have a spider-themed superheroine, her nemesis should naturally be a wasp. And so, I chose the biggest, meanest, scariest wasp (well, actually, hornet, but they're still a part of the Vespidae family and Vespoidea superfamily) and its Japanese name.

2.- What is the worst thing you have done with character nuber 8? 
I don't know. He's seen his friends being killed by the same agancy that brainwashed him and turned into a weapon against his own kind, he's mercilessly killed women and children, he's had several mental breakdowns that end up with him being re-brainwashed... and that's before he gives up his soul to host a ridiculously powerful demon that twists his mind even further and turns him into an omnicidal maniac. And then said demon is expelled from his body, disintegrated and he is left depowered, but sane and with full recollection of every single horrible thing he's ever done. And then he dies like a punk.

3.- What's the most uncomfortable thing for character number 1?
I wouldn't know. On a trivial scale, she really wants to be an accomplished gardener, but her touch instantly kills small living beings. On a larger scale, her scythe is a duplicate of her spine, so she feels every thing that happens to it, and the vibration feed back from hitting things with it is not pretty; also, her physical form is eventually killed and she is forced to remain in her true goddess form back in Mictlan, the Aztec realm of the dead, and is more or less permanently separated from her "sisters".

4.- Name three embarrassing things about character number 4 
-While not embarrassing to her, bu she does embarrass her older sister with her admiration and her fawning over every little thing she accomplishes.
-In her first ten years of her life, she was notoriously impatient and impolite, which led her to recurrent disciplinary beatings for her and stern lectures for her parents and sister.
-She is notoriously unable to control her partner Suchomimus in social situations, which leads her to constant breaches of etiquette wherever she goes.

5.- Have you ever rolled an 18+ situation with character number 8?
I uh, no. I just can't seem to wrap my mind around it, these characters are like my children. Children which I love to make miserable.

6.- What's the thing you hate the most about character number 7?
Not exactly something that I hate, but she is more or less a copypaste of another of my characters. As I worked separately in both stories, their characters began to diverge, but the base, her being basically kindness incarnate, absurdly nice and more or less the kind of woman I'd find perfect both physically and in terms of personality are still there and it bugs me. 

7.- If you had to choose between charactes 10 and 2 to make a series about them, which one  would you choose?
Oh my god. While I think both are interesting prospects, I'd have to decline the dinosaur theme and multi-cultural possibilities of choosing Umang in favor of Redback. Mostly because it would be a series with a female protagonist, but also because I think the "character feels boxed-in and wants to know the world" trope is less interesting than Redback's story. Also, her story is developed further, has more defined secondary characters, I've done a little more world-building for her setting, AND her arc started with the "character feels boxed-in and wants to escape to know the world" thing too, but with a superpowered preteen.

8.- What was the hardest part of creating character number 4?
Justifying her existence, actually. The first time I sketched a cavegirl-ish character on top of a Suchomimus (which loked nothing like her originally), I said "Yep, I'm gonna turn this one into a story". And by the time I was done with her design and the basics of her personality, I was like "Ok, but why do people and dinosaurs coexist? Why would a superpredator allow a teenage girl to ride it?". If that doesn't count, then picking a name for her.

9.- What is the nicest memory you have of character 3? 
Finishing her design and feeling pretty satisfied. It wasn't codex-accurate, but it wasn't generic, either. It felt... like me, something new, done exclusively by me and that actually encouraged me to draw more characters like her and justify their existence by adding them a story.

10.- Would you change character 6's clothing and hair if asked by a producer?
I'm not sure. I suppose that if the changes to her clothes weren't too exaggerated or ridiculous (for a highly sexualized cavewoman-ish design, anyway), I'd approve them, and if the hair went darker I would be cool with it, too.
 
11.- What's the most complicated thing about drawing character 9?
The body type, maybe. She's supposed to be 14, but I don't want to sexualize her too much or draw her like a flat kid. It's hard for me to find a middle ground.
 
12.- Would you sell character 8 for a premium account? 
AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA No.

13.- What was character 5 made for? 
To provide for a specific nemesis for character 2. Kind of like a Scorpion to her Spider-Man. Both in theme and relevance.

14.- Would you like it if characters 7 and 10 swapped personalities?
Hum. That... would actually be kind of interesting. Though both are kind, caring types, Chalchiuhtlicue is more the "wise and collected" type of personality, sometimes bordering in overprotectiveness, while Umang is more like a laid-back surfer dude.

15.- If you could make any of the 10 characters real, which one would you choose?
Hooooooo boy... While I'm tempted to choose any of the goddesses or Redback, I think Umang (character number 10) would be a better choice. I think he'd adjust pretty well into our society and he'd represent a treasure trove of paleontological knowledge. We're talking about someone who actually got to live WITH dinosaurs, and while the same can be said for the Amazons, I think they'd be a little too aggressive and would find it very hard to transition from a matriarchal society into a patriarchal world.

16.- Who would be your ideal slave? 
Short answer? No one. Long answer? The bad guys are an obviously terrible choice, and all of the others have a sense of individuality too strong to be slaves. Also, I wouldn't be able to do that to my characters.

17.- Who would be your ideal lover?
Damn. I'd be tempted to nominate character 7, Chalchiuhtlicue. As previously stated, she is mostly a collection of physical and personal traits that I find attractive, and though most of the goddesses are a projection of a kind of woman I'd feel attracted to, Chalchiuhtlicue is the one with the traits that have the strongest effect on me. I'd also feel partial towards character 3, but she may be too free-spirited and wild for me to keep up with.

18.- Who would be your best friend?
Hum. I'd say... probably character 1, 2 or 4. Mictlantecihuatl is naturally friendly and good-natured (well, more polite than friendly, but still), and she has cool punk aesthetics and tastes. Redback, well, I designed her to be awesome, a fighter girl with an iron will, but also she seems like she would enjoy very much living in our time (she's from the near-future) and would have more or less similar interests. And Itaii is also naturally sociable and good-natured, but also has an intimate knowledge of dinosaurs and their (fictional) environment and has a big interest in art.

19.- Who would be your worst enemy?
In-universe, character 8, Michael Davids is the archenemy of my author avatar, so there's that. I also think Pucu (character 6) would make a formidable enemy, not because her abilities, which are already something to behold, but because she is especially aggressive and xenophobic for a tribe of xenophobic warrior women.

20.- What is the most idiotic thing you have made character 6 do?
Well... she eventually gets killed a small expeditionary force of Warbows (herself in it, but the barely survives) because she's too stubborn to wait for her Itzimitzin to return and decides that she would make a better job at retrieving her friend's sister than Itzimitzin (noted by several other characters to be the best warrior of the tribe) herself. Besides the death of the Warbows, this also worsens and escalates the conflict between tribes into all-out war.

21.- If you could go back in time, would you create character 2 exactly the same or would you change some of its aspects?
Nah. I like her just the way she is. Both in terms of personality and design.

22.- Among the characters present, which one do you like best? 
Redback. Hands down.

23.- Which one do you hate the most?
Agent Davids. I designed the bastard specifically so I could hate him.

Hi everyone!
After a while of not posting Journals (mostly because, looking back, they were EXTREMELY whiny), I've decided to write a little something. In case anyone was wondering how I was doing. And now that I'm turning 28 and closing in on the dreaded thirties, why not?
In the two years that have passed since the last time I wrote, I went through... stuff. I wouldn't say that it's been a lot, since there are others that have it far worse than my fairly shelthered and relatively easy life, but... well, I went through some shit. I lost both grandfathers, I lost one of my two physical friends, I've noticed things that I was too naive or oblivious to notice in the people around me, I dropped out of school, and I found it all actually very humbling. I came to realize how loved I am, if nothing else, by my family, and while I still think I haven't earned a drop of that love, at least now I'm trying to be worthy of it.
For that matter, I still have cripplingly low self-esteem, I'm still very socially awkward and I'm probably more scared of women than I've ever been. But life isn't all that bad. I no longer have the thoughts of ending my life as I occasionally had. I've come to think of life as a very precious thing that should be enjoyed to its fullest, with the bad days and the bright ones, the moments of wrath, sadness, angst, joy, love, and silliness. While I still complain a lot, and about a lot of very petty things, in these years I have gained a bit of insight, and I realize they are petty reasons to be complaining. So I try to complain a little bit less, be more tolerant, be more helpful. It may not be a big difference yet, but I've also realized that expecting huge changes is an excellent way to drain yourself of all willpower. Just take baby steps, put one feet before the other, even if it's not a big difference, it's still something that starts changing the way you live.
As of now, I'm trying to get my shit back together, I've re-enrolled in college, I'm asking for (and taking, in the next weeks) professional help, and... I think it's working. I'm still a very messy human being, but I'm trying to polish those rough edges. And I know I'm not alone. Even if all of the previous text sounds like I'm being whiny and complaining, I assure you I'm not. All of what happened was either the result of my own actions or caused by circumstances way beyond my control. Assuming that led me to believe that the one thing I can control is how I react. I can choose to be mopey and sad and lazy or... I can choose to do something to fix it, or do nothing and keep going, whichever fits better the case. And...  I've made my choice.
I have a lot of people outside the web to thank for that, but also I want to thank all of you for sticking around. Those who read and take the time to post a comment, those who just read, those who don't care about the journals and just are here for the drawings. All of you. You are wonderful and have played a part in making me the person that I am. I am not done yet, but I believe I can be better. I believe I am getting better. And you deserve to be thanked for your part in it.
And... while I may not be the most reliable person, none of you are alone, either.